THE MCJ

WHY PEOPLE HATE LAWYERS

PLEASE tell me this is a joke: 

As a result of a recent series of racist television commercials by Carl's Junior, the French/American community, with the support of the French Consulate, is in the process of organizing a class action lawsuit.

The French/American community is deeply saddened and dismayed by the fact that a United States corporation has chosen to denigrate, humiliate, insult and injure the reputation of French/Americans in order to sell it's product, which is essentially, a sandwich.

The French "bashing" (in the commercials, a voiceover refers to the French as chickens and cowards) is based on historical events and unfairly depicts people of French origin in a truly unsavory manner. The actions of Carl's Junior in these commercials are blatantly racist and a violation of the intent of the United States Constitution's First Amendment regarding the use of Free Speech.

The French/American community, which consists primarily of American citizens and French citizens legally living in the United States, believes that Carl's Junior is trying to unfairly exploit the French government's nonsupport of Coalition forces, spearheaded by the Unites States government, in the recent, and ongoing, Iraq conflict. The French/American community consists of many patriotic American citizens, and non-citizens, who supported, and continue to support, President Bush's actions in Iraq.

Law-abiding and proud French/American community, are seeking to hold Carl's Junior accountable for the malicious, and injurious, action that serves as the foundation for it's discriminatory commercials.

Apparently, the commercial in question runs as follows:

* At the Waterloo, the French surrendered.
* In the Franco-Prussian War, the French surrendered.
* In World War 2, well, the French surrendered.
* Don't be a big chicken. Eat one.

I never knew the French were a race; the things you learn on the Internet.  As for the term "French-American community," some of us with a Frenchman or two back along the ancestral line have never really felt all that sentimental about the old country, excuse me, la mère patrie, since our Huguenot ancestors got run out of the place.  It hurts your feelings when folks start revoking Edicts of Nantes on you.  And what with Crecy, Poitiers, Agincourt, founding St. Louis, Missouri where they did(what, Laclede couldn't have found someplace where the humidity drops below 100% in the summer now and then?), the whole lopping-off-the-royal-domes thing, Napoleon trying to take over the world, two or three monarchies after that, the Dreyfus Affair, rampant government corruption, overpriced wine and overrated cheese, we don't have a whole lot to work with even if we did own French tricolors.

There have been many supremely great, brave and admirable Frenchmen over the centuries.  Joan of Arc, John Calvin and Emile Zola are three examples.  Say what you want about him, the undeniable fact is that one of the first Europeans to realize that the interests of his church and the interests of his state did not necessarily coincide was Cardinal Richelieu.  The French Impressionists were some of the most interesting artists any nation has ever spawned before or since.  But it's not like the English-speaking world's attitude toward the French is anything even remotely new.  In Henry V, Shakespeare puts these words into the mouth of the Duke of Bourbon:

They bid us to the English dancing-schools,
And teach lavoltas high and swift corantos;
Saying our grace is only in our heels,
And that we are most lofty runaways.

I agree that a good deal of French-bashing these days is way over the top.  But if this is, in fact a serious lawsuit and if it does go to court, it deserves to lose and lose badly.  France has been a great nation and can be again.  But it will not get there through silly lawsuits defending its "honor."   

Posted on 12/12/2004 8:45:00 PM , 17 comments